Choose your own adventure.

I am irritated, tired, and unamused by everyone in the world today. I am not happy doing my job. In fact, I am depressed. I ate about 5,000 calories today to help assuage my nervous despair and self-destructive demands for comfort. I am trying to make sense of the story I am writing. Here are a few possibilities (with my own desperate solutions.)

Once upon a time there was a spoiled princess. If you met her, you wouldn't know she was spoiled because she didn't have the nicest new clothes or fanciest new things. But she needed everyone to think she was the most special girl they knew. Then, one day, she became a teacher. Suddenly she was stuck working as hard as she could in a job she was not very special at. Plus, she taught 150 students who all wanted to be special too! She cried and whined every day. She over-ate and stayed up late and became irate. She resented the world! Then she read Victor Frankl's Man's Search for Meaning and realized that she wasn't in Auschwitz, and she could choose both her attitude and the meaning she wanted to find in her life. So, she decided she could choose to believe she was special, even when her circumstances told her otherwise. She decided to stay a teacher to she could teach students the truth she found. THE END.

Or....

Once there was a girl who didn't know what she wanted. She thought that if she just picked SOMETHING than eventually she would like it. So, she forced things. She forced college at the Naval Academy. She forced herself to be an officer in the USMC. She forced a master's degree. She forced bike messenger events. She then forced herself to become a teacher. When she realized it was not a good fit, she started brainstorming about then next bad fit she could force. She strained and strained until her brain hurt. She ate thousands of extra calories. She thrashed around and beat herself up. Finally she decided to apply for a job as a caretaker at a beach for 100,000 pay (http://www.islandreefjob.com/) Even though the job was advertised on "Good Morning America," and showed up in every major newspaper in the country, she got the job! It was there, floating through tropical fish on the Great Barrier Reef, and lounging around in a hammock, that she found her true calling. She finally lost the weight she needed to in order to look cute in a bikini. She wrote--and learned to write well. She had the means and the talent now to pursue her dream of writing people's redemption stories. THE END.

or.

There once was a girl who didn't believe. She didn't believe in redemption stories, or "boy meets girl." She didn't believe in "happily ever after." She didn't believe that God was in charge. She didn't even believe her own thoughts!! She didn't believe her teachers or friends. She didn't believe her therapist, pastor, or doctor. She didn't believe she would make it. She didn't believe she had anything to offer. She didn't believe she had a future. She didn't believe her life had purpose. She didn't believe there was a point to anything she did. She didn't believe that people could help her. She didn't believe things could get better. She didn't believe she could stop compulsively eating. She didn't believe she could be a writer. She didn't believe she would find a calling. She didn't believe that God and Jesus really cared. Then one day something changed--she started to believe. She was not good at believing at first. But then she practiced every day and got better and better. Now she is pretty good at believing. THE END.

or...

Once there was a girl who wanted the answers. She wanted to know what she was supposed to do for the next 20 years. She wanted to know if she would be married or single. Would she have kids? She wanted to know if she would be a teacher, a counselor, a writer, or something else. She wanted to know what God wanted from her. She wanted to know if she should move to China or Africa or Ireland or somewhere she had never been. Then one day she accepted the fact that no one had answers. She realized that people who were the most happy/successful/at peace were able to accept their circumstances, pray, and trust that wherever they were at was where they were supposed to be. THE END.

I prefer the one about the Great Barrier Reef.