Margo

Last night was the first night of my first class in a school counseling master's degree. I did not have a good time. Wednesdays are the longest school day ever. After the longest school day ever, I rode my bike down to the school and showed up just in time. there were about 20 people in the class, mostly young, white, upper-middle class girls. There was one man, and two older women. I sat in back of one of the older women. The class was 2 hrs of introduction...boring. I scribbled down my own thoughts while the teacher blathered on and on. I didn't feel too engaged. Then we had to find partners and talk about ourselves. We were supposed to learn enough about each other to introduce our partners. I did not want to be partners with Margo, but I didn't really care. I curtly answered all the questions we were supposed to answer (where was I in the birth order, what did I like to do, what was my favorite vacation spot and who was my favorite teacher. ) Then she answered the same questions (she was the 2nd out of 3, liked swimming and her twins, liked Playa del Carmen in Mexico and this old pastor was her favorite teacher). Then she started probing me about something and I said too much! I always do that. Why tell a stranger more than I want them to know? Especially advicy strangers! I told her I was struggling at my job. I didn't know why; was it my need to be special? Was it just a bad fit? etc. She told me the books I should read, how much being around other counseling students would help me...etc. We were the last to introduce each other. Everyone else in the room gave cute, succinct introductions (this is Cindy, she likes horses and Hawaii; or Jacky whose brother was in Vegas on a job offer blah blah blah). Then Margo said, "This is Jaimie, she has a need to be special; I would like to hear more about this." My insides immediately cramped. I was twisted up as small as I could go, beet red, and seething!! I didn't mention her "dirty laundry" in her introduction--"This is Margo, she has a negative bastard of a husband." (which she did tell me..in so many words.) I guess part of the reason I was so mad was that so many people in the counseling Masters program are the most unaware, unpersonable, socially inept, unhealthy people I have met!! I would never go to counseling with Margo!! I seethed all class and at the end, debated on whether or not to say something. I decided to--after all she is going to be a counselor for gosh sakes!! So I said, "Margo, I thought it was inappropriate that you shared that I have a need to be special...do you think it would have been appropriate for me to mention you and your negative husband?" She was shocked of course. She started to tell me about how she thought that it was really positive, and she thought that was neat about me, and she really did want to know more about it--maybe others would too, blah, blah, blah. I told her I didn't want to hear it, I didn't trust her at all, and I would be sitting on the other side of the room from her from now on, and she definitely would not "hear more about it." She wanted me to take it back, and she told me I was not being fair. I was too raw to be polite. I don't really want Margo in my life, See? Why do I have to beat around the bush about that? She begged me to let her to plead her case. I just said "BOUNDARIES MARGO!" and left.

Maybe the middle school daily drama is rubbing off on me. I still maintain Margo is socially inept.